Last Friday I had the opportunity to speak at a Father’s Day function1 of The WA Club, regarding what fatherhood means to me. My role was to represent the ‘new father’, speaking alongside two others: John Goodlad as the experienced father, and former Governor of Western Australia, Ken Michael, who represented the role of the grandfather.

Of course, I only had five weeks of parenting experience to draw upon in preparing and presenting my talk. Given my lack of real-world experience, I chose to start by reminding the other parents in the room of some of the joys that come with a new baby. Examples I provided included their delicious soft skin, the feel of their body relaxing as they drift off to sleep in your arms, and or course, the celebration of poos and wees!2

Beyond those recollections, I also chose to speak about my vision for what I would like my fathering style, and the underlying philosophy that guides that style, to be.

This philosophy revolves around seeing fatherhood as stewardship. Stewardship may be defined as ‘the responsible overseeing and protection of something considered worth caring for and preserving’.

It would be very easy, and almost desirable, to attempt to parent David in a way that would see him grow into a mini-me, mimicing my interests, passions and personality traits. Yet, taking a stewards’ view, it is more appropriate that I parent David in a way that allows him the freedom to make decisions that will allow him to become the person he wants to be.

Just as I have arrived where I am today as a result of the decisions and choices I made along the way, in parenting David I should provide him the freedom and opportunity to make choices that will allow him to follow his calling, and become the person he wants to be – not necessarily the person I want him to be.

Of course, this is not me abrograting my responsibilities as a parent. My very important job is to teach, provide and protect, in a way that will equip David with the ability to make sensible and appropriate decisions, understanding that each choice has ramifications and consequences.

Ultimately, I do not believe that I can adopt a command and control methodology to parenting. I need to be a Dad who is nurturing, guiding, and supporting. A true steward.